In the still of the night

Oh how I wish you could see my pup, Patyon right now. It's the wee hours of the morning and pretty quiet here in my house. Everyone is in bed but me. This is some of my favorite time--late night/early morning.

While I was sitting here in the stillness of the night, I happened to look down and there is Payton on her back, eyes closed, and legs sprawled--one kind of up in the air, the other three relaxed. By her side is the toy ball she was playing with before she fell asleep.

I wish I were more like Payton--totally trusting, relaxed, not a care in the world. She reminds me of my children when they were little. I'd sneak in their rooms at night just to check on them. They looked just like little angels. In fact, they were so still I sometimes wondered (okay, let's get real here. . I worried) if they were still alive. It's kind of like that scene in Terms of Endearment where Shirley MacLaine continually checks on her baby to make sure she's still breathing.

Ah, Payton just sighed and has rolled over on her side, still totally unaware of my presence. And you know I really want to be like her.

You see I want to be so comfortable, that despite the circumstance I can feel totally safe, protected, relaxed, not worried and on and on. And although I can claim that for myself more often than not, I'm afraid it's still broken by my temporary lack of trust from time to time.

So, just how do I secure that consistency? I know I have everything I need because I have the Holy Spirit abiding in me. Come on! What more do I need?

Of course, the answer to that is nothing. I simply need to go back to my roots--to become that little child who always trusted that mom and dad would be there for her, or in my example tonight the pup who trusts her owner to take care of her, protect her and provide for all her needs.

I learned in the conference that I recently attended that my prayers need not be elaborate. So I think I'll take that advice and simply end this with three words to my Heavenly Father:

"Help me, please!"


Enough said. Time to join Payton and catch some ZZZZZZ's.